We all have a mindset.

And we are all different. One person’s mindset isn’t fully the same as another’s. As a result we think, believe, see, and act differently.

But, there is ONE mindset that millions of us the world over do share. One that is present every single day that destroys our happiness and joy in life. It’s very common and if you haven’t got it…you will probably know someone who clearly has.

For every goal, wish, hope, or dream, this mindset will kill it all.

It prefers instead to live in the past. A negative past it keeps on looking for and deciding will never change and projecting it onto the here and now.

A mindset that unhappily personalises everything that did happen, and is still happening.

The poor me mind.

Our minds don’t see what there is to see. They see what we believe is to be seen.

An event, situation, or conversation can occur and ten people will all view it differently. Each individual’s mindset projects a different personal meaning onto the actual reality.

However, ONE mindset many hold that covers most scenarios that they become involved with is the ‘Poor me’ belief. The self attached tag they place on themselves each time. Even if all seemed fine at the time, their mind will work overtime to kill this. It will announce how wronged or unwanted or always suffering the person was….and always is.

No matter how anything turns out, they are meant to be wounded and hurt.

Why?

Because they possess the Victim Mindset.

Self sabotage in our head.

The No.1 killer of mentality and any self confidence and worth is the Victim Mindset.

It defines so many of us as the permanent casualty and loser in life. We may wear a smile for others to see, but underneath we feel worthless and unappreciated. At worst we consider we are ugly, unloved, and deliberately singled out for poor treatment.

The inner victim is always awake and self sabotaging our life.

The victim mentality kicks in often. The boss at work is grumpy – it’s always against you. Traffic is hell again – it’s typical, happens to you more than others. Your Amazon order goes astray or they send the wrong size – yep, you knew something would go pear shaped.

In almost any scenario the victim mindset is present. Rarely does it take a back seat. The odd snafu that most believe will hit us all randomly some days, to the victim mindset is permanently guaranteed to find them any day. Others get the odd hassle, they get the regular full force.

There are no accidents or mistakes or ‘one of those things’.

The victim keeps choosing to be the victim.

How to be a victim no more.

Having a Victim Mindset is to participate in a victimless crime.

A mental crime without anyone getting injured. The only hurt is in the head. The only thing stolen is peace of mind.

It is to make yourself a full victim by wiring your mind to seek out being constantly negatively singled out. Every situation is a crime scene waiting to happen with you slap bang in the middle. But, it can be broken and you can be free.

The answer lies at the start and the end.

1. In any given scenario the second something occurs (usually less luckily for you) or a comment made literally SHRUG YOUR SHOULDERS. At the same time say (if in private) or think, ‘That’s not me’, three times. It sounds illogical but it’s breaking up the mind’s link to the belief that it is always you that gets to experience tough stuff. Then, leave the moment alone and carry on as if everything is normal.
2. DO NOT REVISIT – this is the killer for many because they keep going over and replaying the scene again and again. But badly. They become the victim in it. SO DON’T. What’s gone has gone. Focus ON the right now and how much better things can become day after day. Look forwards to something.

Repeat, repeat, repeat. Break the mental chain.

(**NB – To further help with this I’m going to post about the magic of Reframing the mind in a few weeks. It is a game changer!!).

Freedom awaits.

It’s time for freedom!

If you have a victim mindset you have millions of fellow mental victims out there too. You don’t want to be like them anymore. You want to enjoy life. To never making yourself the one to blame or be punished ever again.

You never were. You BECAME the victim. A role you chose to play. One you got used to accepting.

So, accept a new one. Tell your mind you are singled out for joy, good surprises, great people, and more. Tell it and keep finding proof so your mindset kicks in and says, ‘Yes that’s you’.

Keep that up and you are going to turn it all around.

The success mindset is not far away!

Photo attributions – Free to use under Pixabay Content License by Leix and Ryan McGuire and Shooinau.